I have a bad habit, it is the habit of comparing myself to others. My family all tell me that I shouldn't do it because I am my worst critic. That is just what I do though. I know I'm not alone in this habit. My habit has pushed me however, to go on and do better things with my life. In some instances it has stifled me to just quit and give up. The mantra in my head goes like this: "they are so much more talented, creative, (insert word)". I knew when I joined the BJP that I would have a tendency to do either of the two, challenge myself or be stifled. So far I have noticed how easily some can open up and talk about the most intimate details of their painful days and it is released in their beautiful beadwork. That to me is truly art, if you can convey your feelings through a piece of your beadwork or whatever medium you are using. I don't feel I have reached that point yet. Even in my beadwork, I try to stay on the 'lighter' side. I have my share of challenges in life and so far my pieces have been about the seasons and how the seasons feel to me. Am I trying to cover up negative feelings by doing just positive things like the seasons? I'm an honest person and I should be able share easily. My goal is to look deeper and try to convey some of my inner thoughts and translate that to at least one of my monthly tags. That is hard for me to do and it will certainly come out when I least expect it. Scrolling through everyones blogs I have felt joy, inspiration, sadness, envy, annoyance and most of all an even bigger hunger for beading than ever before. The holidays are coming up and that always has a way of bringing out the emotions in me. Novembers piece will be about family.
3 days ago